I'm finally street legal!

I'm sure everybody will be happy to note that my tricked out '95 Ford Escort LX (known as Tiny Dancer or Time Bomb) is now, for the first time since I've owned it, street legal. About a month and a half ago the law finally caught up with me and cited me for not having a front license plate. It was easy enough to get the new license plate but proved to be very difficult to actually put it on the car. I mean of course I never really tried to put it on my self but the two people who did had a hard time. Finally, my dad just power drilled it to my front bumper. And hey, that works for me.

Also, a very Happy New Year! The New Year is always a little hopeful and a little depressing. It's great because it's sort of a symbol of new beginnings, putting the past a little bit further behind or moving on to do new exciting things (like be a Senior Park Aide!). But then it can be depressing because I know I'm not going to stick to my resolutions to exercise and read more and blah blah blah. But hey, maybe 2008 really will be different! Be wishes and much happiness from the depths of my heart!

I am a Gourmet Chef!

Today's Lunch Special:

Microwaved cheese sandwich served open-faced on a hotdog bun. Enjoyed with a spoon.

Hey at least it's free! And actually it tasted really great! I'm cheap. And lazy.

O My G!

Wow, so like where did December go?! I wasn't even ready for Christmas until the 23rd and now it's done and gone. Dang it! I mean, I still had a good eventful time and I am so thankful for being able to spend time with family. Let's see, some of my best presents where a couple of gigantic National Geographic photography books (they weigh about 20lbs each!), a mini Swiss Army knife, and a hot pink fuzzy bathrobe from the cutest sister in the world.

I am hoping to post some pictures soon but the computer with the pictures doesn't have internet and vice versa. Keep your eyes out though.

Another totally random thing: I've been listening to Relient K a lot lately and they are fabulous. If you go to their website you can listen to some of their newest music for free! "Forgiven" is like the best ever.

Lastly, Happy Boxing Day!

I'm going to jail

This is just a post to say goodbye to all of my friends and family. You read it correctly, I'm awaiting an arrest. Any day now a police officer will come to get me. What was my crime? Fraud. Or racketeering. Either one... maybe both? So I have been helping with the Polar Express train ride event at the museum selling tickets and doing will call. What does that have to do with anything and why would I go to jail for that? Well, let me tell you. My accuser is a gentleman who ordered tickets for the Polar Express and was upset that he was charged a "shipping" charge when his tickets weren't actually shipped. They were put in will call, which it said on the website when the tickets were ordered and the fee is $3 for shipping or processing. Apparently it's fraud to charge a processing fee and call it shipping. Anyway, I'm off to jail, send me a care package.

For the Image Conscious

This blog has a lot to do with things I love. I'd like to introduce you to another love of mine: art. When I was in Spain this past January I had the priviledge of visiting some spectacular art museums, including the world famous Prado. It was here that I first laid my eyes on the real subject of this blog: Peter Paul Rubens' "The Three Graces." My understanding of the image is that the woman on the left was Rubens' first wife, the one on the right was his second wife, and the woman in the middle is the ideal combination of the two of them. Here is the image.



I mean check these ladies out! It looks like there is not an ounce of muscle on all of their bodies combined! Now, I'm not advocating that we stop exercising, I just love that these are the women that Rubens found to be beautiful. Being perfectly toned isn't everything. In fact, I'd like to start a movement. I'll call it "Embrace the Muffin Top!" Or maybe that's more of a slogan. But either way, I'd like to try to live my life being comfortable in my own skin. In fact, I like my little stomach! I don't have abs at all and it's fabulous! So ladies and gentlemen that is my charge to you, be like Peter Paul Rubens and Embrace the Muffin Top.

I just had a hankering...

So I like old school DC Talk, I'll be honest. I mean really who can resist? For some reason I was thinking of the song "That Kinda Girl," probably because it is so fantastic, and so I thought I would share the rap at the beginning with those of you who might be unfamiliar or those who would just like to be bask in its timeless glory. Of course it's not the same without the background guy responding to the lyrics as an anecdote but still, enjoy.

The other night I met a girl
And she looked to be so nice
I asked her for the digits
And she didn't think twice
A couple of days later called her up and asked her out
She said,"with you?" I said, "with me,"
And then she said, "without a doubt"
I took her to the Garden where
I guess they grow the Olives
She wore a tighter skirt
Than any I had seen in college
She said, "I love to smoke and drink
While cursing like a sailor"
I asked her where she got her mouth
And if she had a tailor
Finally I walked her to the door to say goodnight
She said, "I am an apple,Would you care to take a bite?"
Politely I refused and said, "I'm looking for a lady"
So she slapped me in my face and said,
"Boy, you must be crazy"

Naps, Glorious Naps

Naps are another thing I love. Sleep. It's so good! It's refreshing, relaxing and another great advantage is that it helps me avoid problems! A nap sounds sooo good... too bad I have to sell tickets to crazy people who want to visit a railroad museum on a rainy Tuesday afternoon.

Apparently, I'm a Genius

But of course I already knew that. Thank you blog-readability-tester-thingy for showing everybody what I'm made of.

Eat that Rachel.

Time for a little History!

Thanksgiving is tomorrow! I love Thanksgiving! You get to sit around and eat hearty-fatty food until you're about to burst, and then it's time for pie. I am thankful for mashed potatoes.

The first Thanksgiving that we all celebrate was held in 1621 by the Mayflower pilgrims in Massachusetts. Really, there was another Thanksgiving held 2 years earlier in 1619 in Viriginia-- just ask the folks at Historic Williamsburg, they'll tell you. So we've got 2 Thanksgivings to be thankful for. Right after independence from Britain was when the concept of a day set aside for thanks really took off. Something like 6 different presidents made proclamations about Thanksgiving: what it meant, when it should be held, etc, and it was Franklin D. Roosevelt who finally set the date as the 4th Thursday of Novemeber in 1939. Here are some words that our first president, George Washington, had to say about Thanksgiving:

"Now therefore I do recommend and assign Thursday the 26th day of November next to be devoted by the People of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be—That we may then all unite in rendering unto him our sincere and humble thanks—for his kind care and protection of the People of this Country..."

I'm thankful for you! Happy Thanksgiving!

This is how much I love Geography...

One time Rachel, Ian and I made pancakes in the shape of all the continents except Asia. That's where I come in. And check out Australia and South America! Spot on!

"Firebaugh, You Might Just Get Stuck Here!"

Alright, here's an adventure story for everbody! If you have read Rachel's Blog recently you will have read a little bit about the "Santa Barbara" trip that occurred this past weekend. I put that in quotations because we made it as far as Firebaugh (or just south of a truck stop losely related to Firebaugh proper) and ended up on the side of the road for a few hours and over night in the lovely Best Western, Apricot Inn sharing a king bed. The next day we had ourselves a tour of 2 out of the 4 gas stations, the park, the market, the cotton fields and the historic van before being picked up by Heather's dad and grandpa. Come to find out (via the visitors' binder in our hotel room that looked like it had been written by a 6th grader) Firebaugh has a history of things getting stuck there, like us, the historical van, and a river boat in the early 20th century. No adventure is complete without photo documentation so here are some of the best moments from our weekend on the outskirts of hell.

Here's Rachel with the bleeding van.

Just one example of how we entertained ourselves.

You've heard of picture in picture, well here is broken down van in broken down van.

Just look at our sweet ride!

Here's to Maps!

I have very very very exciting news! This week... you'll never guess!... this week is Geography Awareness Week 2007!!! Now, I love Geography. I love it so much! Here is a little known fact about me: in Jr. High I participated in the National Geography Bee at my school. I scored high enough in my class to compete with students from other classes. When I was in 7th grade I won 3rd place, which was very exciting, but then 8th grade-- oh the glories of 8th grade-- I actually won 1st place! Of course, what I'm not telling you is that my school had about 400 people total. But still!! I was so proud of myself and I still think I have a great memory for geographical fact. If you love Geography too, take a National Geographic trivia quiz! Or check out other games and trivia here!

Take Two

A cheery good morning! I have good news for all of you-- the millions of you-- who were disappointed they weren't able to go to the Monday night showing of The LOVE Documentary! There is another one tomorrow night! I know what you're thinking, "But Alison went on Monday and I really just wanted to go so I could sit next to her." Well, you're in luck! I never made it to the Monday night show! But I am going with a small group of friends tomorrow (at 7:30), so if you want to fight over the two seats next to me you're welcome to come. I'm sure it will be good times for all.

In other news, last night Rachel and I watched a Finnish movie!


It's called "Mother of Mine" or "Aideista parhain" and is set during World War II, first in Finland and then in Sweden. So apparently during WWII tens of thousands of Finnish children were sent to Sweden to avoid the conflict, and this particular story follows a 9 year old boy who, like any other kid, has trouble adjusting to the changes that are forced on him. Finland was in a particularly bad spot because they were allied with the Germans but share a border with Russia, an enemy of the Germans. In the story the main character, Eero, finds himself with two mothers, one who he feels abandoned him, and the other who is a complete stranger. Anyway, the film won 3 Finnish Oscars, a bunch of film festival awards and it made me cry so I thought it was great. Plus, it's always great to learn something new about Scandinavia!

Crazy Little Thing Called...

The LOVE Documentary will be showing Monday and Thursday nights at 7:30! I'm getting really excited! If you don't know how to get to the Crest here's how. It's a 90 minute documentary all done locally! Tickets are $10 for general admission. Come and meet me there!

Shameless Promotion

Hello once again my faithful friends and readers! Today I'd like to tell you about an exiting and unique event coming up in the Sacramento area. Some lovely folks I know have put together a documentary... The LOVE Documentary to be precise, and they are showing it at the Crest Theater this upcoming Monday and Thursday. I think it will be tons of fun and I'm probably going on Monday so hopefully I'll see you there! Here's a little sneak-peek! I'll post the show times a little bit later...

"It's not a toomah"

So if you've spent any amount of time with me you might know that I get headaches. Like a lot. A least one a day pretty much. They usually last for 10-15 minutes making me slightly incapacitated and definitely more grumpy, but then they go away. Lately it seems like they've been getting a little bit worse-- of course, it could be that I'm a big baby. Either way, it's now and it feels bad. But the point that I really wanted to make was that I'm not sure what causes these headaches. I have some ideas though, and here they are:

1. I spend too much time hunched over at a computer.
2. It's residual pain from whiplash.
3. I have plugged up sinus issues.

Upon further thought I came to some conclusions as to what I might do to remedy the situation:

1. Give all of my computers away to the poor.
2. Go back in time and prevent the accident that caused the whiplash.
3. Cut off my head.

But please, don't pity me for my sorry state, it's really not as bad as I might make it sound. I should probably just drink more water.

To All My Admiring Fans

I can see already that this blog is going to be hugely popular. I mean I've already had 9 views, and a few comments on the blog and off. Of course, I've got my critics, too. Already it has been pointed out to me that I occassionally spell things wrong and that I need to include links when I reference another site. Well critics, just you wait! You'll see! Pretty soon I'll have like 20 profile views from people all around the globe! I'll show you what a beautiful thing this blog will be! A forum for learning and understanding, where freedom of expression reigns and high moral values are lifted up! So to all my admiring fans (which I think includes the critics, too) Thank you. Thank you for faithfully reading my blog in its first few days of life.

Thank you.

Interesting Religious Figures

I was reading Rachel's blog earlier today and she mentioned one of my favorite characters from the Bibile: Samson. Now, I love Samson because he was so B.A. killing fools with a donkey's jawbone and lighting foxes on fire to burn up the Philistines. Another traditional religious figure is Santiago Matamoros, or Saint James the Moor Killer, who is very common in Spanish iconography. According to legend it was Santiago who helped the Christians take Spain back from the Moors by valiently leading them into battle with his spirit hundreds of years after his death. As much as I'm fascinated by these Biblical men, they have traditionally been revered for doing brutal and violent things. How do I, as a modern Christian woman, reconcile this to current moral values and standards? On one hand, my faith and values should be more important than anything else in my life and I shouldn't try to change them because the World has different standards. On the other hand, killing people just because they belong to a certain religious group just isn't right either.

I couldn't help myself!

What do you do with spare internet time? You create a blog! I mean, right?