Merry Christmas Eve!

Here is my gift to all of you who read this blog. Happy Holidays!

Love Is Like...

Yesterday at church the sermon was called "Following a Star to Love," it being the Sunday we light the Love Advent candle. Love, I think, is one of the most important Christian messages and it speak volumes about who God is and how he relates to us. The scripture passage used for the sermon really spoke to me. It was 1 John 4:16b-19:

"God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us."

I added the italics, because those are two points that especially speak to me. First, I have felt in the past that I fear a great many things in this life. Fear causes me to be paralyzed and stagnant; I don't grow because I fear what might come with change. I fear people's disapproval and I fear being disliked or alone. But! There is no fear in love! I know that there are people in my life who love me, and I know that God first loved me, so in this knowledge I try to fear a little bit less.

My pastor also made a great point. He said, "Love is like oxygen." This immediately caused me to want to sing! I know he meant that without love we can't survive, but all I was hearing for a minute or two was, "Love is like oxygen/ You get too much you get too high/ Not enough and you're gonna die..." If you're not sure what I'm talking about, just watch this!

When Life's Getting You Down

Do this!

Cozy Time

I know Fall is almost officially over but I just had to share some thoughts about it. While Spring is my favorite season of the year, Fall comes in at a close second. Fall is one of the reasons I like Northern California better than Southern California. Fall is a magical season. It's the season of bounty, of harvest, of thanksgiving. It seems slower and more thoughtful-- days get shorter, the weather gets chillier. It's a time to stay inside and curl up with a blanket in front of a fire with a good book. Fall is a family-oriented time of the year. But what is my favorite thing about Fall? The colors! And yes, for those doubting Thomas', Sacramento does show fall colors! We're no New England, but there are beautiful pockets of color that pop up all over the place. And when it's foggy or rainy the colors just become more saturated and more beautiful. I love it when the leaves change color, but I hate it when they fall off. And they are mostly gone now. That plus my growing circumference tells me that Winter is fast approaching.

Hello!

It's been a little while since I've said hello to the blogging world! I've been very busy-- a booming social life you know. The other night I was hanging out with some friends from church and impromptu-like we started trying to say "Hello" is as many languages as possible. I believe collectively we got up to 12! Now, I can't recall Cambodian, but I think I can remember quite a few others (although forgive the spelling!):

English: Hello (no doi!)
Spanish: Hola
French: Bonjour
Italian: Ciao or Bonjourno
German: Halo
Hawaiian: Aloha
Cantonese: Na-ho
Hebrew: Shalom
Swahili: Hujambo/Sijambo
Farsi?: Salam

Alright, that's 10ish, given that a couple are misspelt and another for which I'm not sure of the corresponding language. Can anyone add/enlighten/correct?

Need some inspiration on Election Day?

Recently, the Sacramento Bee asked readers to send in Haikus about the upcoming election. I found the results to be highly entertaining. Some are pretty straight-forward, people sharing their opinions, but many are very clever, and dripping with cynicism that can't help but make me laugh. The following are a few of my favorites:

Absentee votes count.
Bigfoot may really exist.
Just not in this state.

Propositions, bah!
Remember Nancy Reagan?
Just Say No to all!

Lawmakers draw their own districts;
How Cozy!
Elect Rand McNally.

Click here to read the rest.

I Gotta Have...

More George Michael! You should watch the Faith music video! Not so sure? Here are the top 5 reasons I think you should:

1. The one-leather-glove clap
2. The 5 o'clock shadow with razor sharp edges
3. The ridiculous booty shot in the very beginning
4. His mad dancing skills
5. You can't help but sing along!

"Work"

So I'm at work today, but I'm in an empty office. Unsupervised. I've got some things to do but nothing really really imperative. So what have I been doing? Well, for the last hour (after my hour lunch) I've been looking at e-mail and facebook and listening to the radio-- currently George Michael's Faith. Basically, I feel great! What would be better? If I could sit outside with a book and sunbathe. Although for me it would be more like sunburn... still...

Wow, that's... uh....

I've said it before, but I'll say it again. National Geographic is amazing. Meet Baby Sloth!

I'm very fortunate!

The other day I got a great fortune from a fortune cookie. This cookie told me, "You will be fortunate in everything." Wow! Really? Awesome! Best. Fortune. Ever.

Finally!

I finally got 10 out of 10 on the National Geographic Geography Bee Quiz! It was this quiz.

"The Drop"

Every Tuesday I go to a bar in midtown to play some trivia. This bar happens to be a Coyote Ugly style place, where the bar itself is big enough for dancing. Now, Tuesday's don't see much dancing action but on weekends when it's packed, dancing on the bar is a favorite pastime for the ladies. One clutch move is "the drop," which is to "drop it like it's hot." It tickles me because they're dropping it like it's hot. It's not necessarily actually hot, but it's like hot. But hey, good for them for getting up there in the first place, right?

Oh, State Exams

Wow. 7:25am. An oral exam. It was icky. If it were just up to my charming personality and good looks I would have nailed it, but unfortunately they wanted me to know certain things. Ah well, I can't say for sure how I did for another 6 weeks. So I suppose only Time will tell...

Trapped In Time

Or maybe it's more like trapped by time. As you can see, I almost went the whole month of September without doing a blog post! Of course I couldn't let that happen.

The thing is, I'm not a very good multi-tasker. I also do everything slowly. If you know me at all, you know I run late all the time. I mean, at work I'm pretty efficient because people are depending on me to get things done, but if I were just left to my own devices, I'd be constantly distracted. Because I am aware of these personal qualities, I like to set aside time for individual tasks. If I'm going to call someone, I want to have at least 15 to 30 minutes available to talk. Same thing if I'm going to clean my bathroom or do some online banking. I haven't really mastered the art of time management, of sneaking things in when I've got 5 spare minutes in the middle of my day. All this means that I feel so bogged down! I feel like time is a vice, and I'm... something in the middle of a vice! So if you haven't heard from me in awhile, it's just because I want to dedicate a large chunk of time to you. I just haven't found a big enough chunk because you are that important!

Huh?

5:45am. Upstairs neighbor vacuuming. Is it wrong to assume that drugs are involved?

You all know I like geography, right?

Well, I really like geography. When my geography knowledge is being tested I even get a little adrenaline rush. I love it! Recently, I have taken a few challenges which I would encourage others to explore as well. The first test was to see how many countries I could name in 5 minutes. I hand wrote 67 correctly spelled country names in 5 minutes. Then I decided I would just try to write out as many countries as I could remember without timing myself. I named 165 different countries. There are approximately 193 countries in the world (the number varies according to different sources). I'd say that's not bad.

Just Take a Guess...

It's a dog... It's a horse... No, it's... ugly.

You Don't Have to Worry About Me

Although I am a State employee, I currently still have a job! Hooray! In fact, I have some new opportunities comimg my way. Perhaps more on that later...

Last Action Hero

Apparently our governor wants his term to be a little bit more like an action movie. It seems he has learned from such films as "Terminator" and "Kindergarten Cop" that if he threatens people things will get done the way he wants them to be done. And ok, I see his strategy: be so outrageous something has to happen, but really, it makes all of us peons working for the state feel lame about ourselves. I don't actually think I'm going to lose my job but it's still annoying I have to worry about it at all. Anyway, good luck fellow dispensables!

State Facts

Alright, I know many of you have probably been waiting for me to post my answers to the California state trivia instead of look it up yourselves, so, finally, here it is!

State Bird: California Valley Quail
State Flower: California Poppy
State Rock: Serpentine
State Butterfly: Dogface
State Tree: California Redwood
and just for good measure...
State Fish: Golden Trout

For more fun facts about California symbols check out the State Library website.

Also, thanks to Jeremy for the New Jersey fast facts!
State Bird: Eastern Goldfinch
State Flower: Common Meadow Violet

Doesn't Everyone Know...

I was recently having a discussion with a fellow originally from New Jersey and I asked him what the state bird and state flower are. I figured those are the two random facts everybody knows about their home state, right? Not so in this particular case! Now, I understand that sometimes my fascination with certain things (Geography is a prime example) leads me to have a skewed vision of what other people know. So, I wanted to know how many of my faithful readers do in fact know the state bird and flower of which ever state they grew up in.

On a side note, I can name California's state bird, flower, rock, butterfly, and tree with a great deal of confidence. If anyone else would like to share their knowledge here of California or any other state, please feel free!

Happy Flag Day!

Do you know what Flag Day celebrates? Well, the American Flag, duh. But of course, I wanted to know the details so please, allow me to share them with you!

Betsy Ross is said to have designed the first flag with 13 stars and 13 stripes.

Flag Day commemorates the adoption of the Stars and Stripes (also known as Old Glory) as the official Flag of the United States on June 14, 1777 by the Second Continental Congress. President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed it a national day of commemoration in 1916, and it was adopted more officially in 1949 through an Act of Congress. Flag Day is not an official federal holiday but was made a state holiday by Michigan in 1937-- the only state to ever do so. In conclusion, Michigan is great and so is the American Flag. Happy Flag Day!

My Pastimes

Two of my favorite things to do are read good books and watch good movies. Lately I've been doing quite a bit of both. "Good" can mean very different things in this context. Sometimes it's just entertaining (like the movie Wedding Date), and sometimes it's actually quality (like the book To Kill A Mockingbird). This weekend I found a new favorite: Lars and the Real Girl. It's a sweet and funny story about a lonely guy who orders a fiance on the internet-- in the form of a sex doll. The movie is not in any way lewd though-- the small town comes together to show "Bianca," and in effect Lars, how loved and cared for they are. The music was lovely and whimsical, too. In fact, I liked the whole thing so much I watched it first on Friday and then twice today!


I'm currently reading Atonement by Ian McEwan, although I haven't seen the movie. I'll keep you posted on that one!

Extremely Beautiful and Incredibly Sad

I just finished the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer. The main character of the book is a nine year old boy who lost his father in the World Trade Center collapse of 9/11. I absolutely loved the book and read through it really quickly. Here is what I liked about the book:

1. The literary style. It was so creative and poetic! The book begins towards the end of the story and the chapters are interspersed with present and the distant past-- which adds a bit of mystery and entices the reader onward.

2. The main character. I read a review that called the main character, Oskar, "precocious" and "irritating," but I thought he was extremely hilarious! Children think and cope differently than adults so using Oskar's point of view made it so much more touching and emotional. Which brings me to my next point...

3. It made me cry! I don't think I've ever cried for a book as much as I cried for this one. This shows me that the author is talented enough to draw real emotion out of me. And ok, I tend to be a pretty empathetic person anyway, but if a story can make me cry, I tend to like it that much more.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close was a very touching and somewhat haunting book. At times I felt the style was so poetic and modern that it made the story a little bit unrealistic, but overall I thought it was just a prettier way to express deep emotions. I'd recommend this book to anybody, just keep a box of tissues with you while you're reading.

I Don't Know Why The Caged Bird Sings

As some of you may know, my sister and I have a new man in our life. He is very short, green, and sings when we run water. His name is Kiwi. He is a parakeet! We're still getting used to each other and I think he's a bit suspicious of us. He screeches at us and flaps his wings as hard as he can and bites our fingers when we hold him, but I'm sure, in time, we'll all be fast friends. He is a fun little addition to our apartment and certainly livens things up. So everybody, here is Kiwi (and Rachel)!

The Darkness is not dark at all!

There are certain songs that you have to stop for whenever they start to play and just dance or sing along or sit in awe. One such song for me is "I Believe in a Thing Called Love" by The Darkness, which my friend Annie played for me for the first time when we were down in Santa Barbara together. Other than that song, I don't know that I have really heard much from The Darkness and so I decided it was high time to look up music videos on youtube. Here is what I found. You can't go wrong when the song features a key-tar.

Something Lighter

I know I just posted like 10 minutes ago but I had to show everybody something I have just rediscovered. It's an historical blog that I think many of you will enjoy, even if you generally don't like history. So please allow me to introduce Mustaches of the Nineteenth Century!

Growing Pains

Is it a requirement for things to get crazier and crazier the older you get? It has seemed like that so far in my life. So when I'm 50 and I'm dealing with my husband being mauled by a Grizzley Bear and my children being abducted by aliens I'll just be like, "Dang it, not again!"

What is Your Marital Status When Filing for Taxes?

Single. Yep, it seems like I am one of the last single women in my age bracket in the whole wide world. It seems like every other day I'm hearing about someone who got married, is about it get married, is planning on getting married, etc. And don't get me wrong, I'm really happy for these people, these friends and aquaintances of mine who I know deserve a lot of love. It's just a little crazy feeling sometimes. But that's ok, because I'm still holding strong. I'm celebrating 3 months of freedom and learning more about being myself without trying to please or impress anybody. It's a good place for me right now. At 24, I'm growing up.

Nasty Story for the Day

Alright, so, I work in a railroad musuem. The building is not particularly well sealed since there are tracks running in and out of it, etc. Occasionally we get rats or mice in the museum. Today, a visitor pointed out to me a smallish rat (about 4 inches long, not including the tail) stuck inside one of the exhibits-- a surveyor's tent to be precise. The rat was stuck on a sticky trap and trying to pull itself off. Ok, already, that's pretty gross. But wait! There's more! Upon further inspection it seems there are two rats stuck there-- one is dead and the other is stuck and struggling to free itself. When I was telling my coworker Becky about this she said, "Yeah, that is gross-- it's trying to rip it's leg off so it can get away." Sick.

Happy Easter and Happy Spring!

I love springtime! Everything is so fresh and new and lovely and blooming and green! I had a great morning, too. Rach and I went to the sunrise service for Fremont down by the river. There was some great music (including the song "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2!) and great speakers. Plus you can't beat the sunrise over the river. So, Happy Easter everybody!

Sometimes I Feel Like...

... an Irish mummy. You know, all "bogged" down. Thank you, thank you, don't forget to tip your waitress! So, I already sort of knew that I was not much of a mulit-tasker but I'm beginning to see just how inflexible I can be! I'm so excited about my new promotion, that I now have my own work phone number and e-mail and desk and computer; but I'm still getting used to my new responsibilities. And now I'm beginning the process of moving! And I'm just a crazy emotional girl anyway! And I'm lazy! Oh well, acknowledging these things is the first step, right?

Ok, so this picture is a little creepy but it's from National Geographic and it fits the topic... sort of...

Looking for A Partment

You read that right, my sister and I have begun the arduous task of finding an apartment (or a partment). And this is how I feel about it:

It's fun to search but difficult to actually get out and see the places. Especially when you're looking in midtown. And don't totally know what you want. And have to work on the weekends. So basically I think I'm going to either settle for something cheap or just live with Dad for another 10 years.

Coming soon (hopefully) pictures of my recent day trip to the coast.

I like candy hearts that say, "Hello Foxy"

Everybody knows what tomorrow is right? Valentine's Day! Now, there are many opinions that people hold about February 14th. Many people think it's very romantic, others find it depressing, and still others protest it as being cheesy and commercial, and these feelings are often dependent on whether or not the person has a special somebody. Some people have been asking me how I feel about it, since I recently broke up with someone. Guess what? I feel fine! Really, I'm neither here nor there with Valentine's day, I could take it or leave it. But here are somethings that I've been doing: I bought my family a bouquet of tulips, I was singing "Dream a Little Dream of Me" while at work, I went out with friends and kicked booty in a pub quiz last night. I've been having a great week and I'm surrounded by people who care about me and appreciate me. Plus, daffodils are blooming in my front yard and yesterday it got up to 74 degrees. Welcome, Valentine's Day!

Just Call Me Leland Stanford

Last night some friends and I got together for a game night extravaganza! The only game we played (because it is extremely time consuming) was Monopoly. I was so excited even before I started because I was able to be the little locomotive game piece! But then, to continue with the fun, I was the first to land on a Railroad, which I promptly purchased. I was able to land on and aquire 3 of the 4 railroads and then I traded Rach for the other one. I had a railroad monopoly! If you know anything about railroading history in California you would know that there were 4 men, known as the "Big 4" who owned the Central Pacific Railroad. Anyway, the president of the CP was Leland Stanford, who was also a governor of California and whose family founded Stanford University. So, in essence, I became Leland Stanford last night. Or the East Coast/New Jersey alternative. It was some good ol' stuff. I made lots of money but it wasn't very fulfilling. Monopoly breeds discontent. But for a game night extravaganza we still had fun!

These are the namesakes of the gameboard railroads:

And a political cartoon made about the "Big 4" and the railroads in California:

You're Killin' Me, Smalls!

It's been far too long since I have done a blog post, and boy am I feeling it! I have like a gozillion topics to write about ranging from deep personal feelings to reality tv, but I don't seem to have enough time to write more than a few lines. So blogging world, I just wanted to say I miss you.

Psalms Kick Ass!

So something like 3 years ago I began to read the book of Psalms backwards. I'm still only about halfway done, but boy do I like this book! If ever there was a book about the nature of God, this is it. It's all about his justice and grace and love and particularly, some of the stuff that I love best, is about his majesty. I mean if you've created the whole universe and know how many hairs are on everybody's heads, you've got to be pretty majestic, right? Last year while I was in Spain this was the theme verse for our trip:

"Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage." Psalms 84:5

Psalms just fit so well with what I feel! Ok, so not the ones about how great Israel is or the "He should punish my enemies" ones... although... well, only if it goes along with His plans I guess. But really, in as much seriousness as I can muster, I love Psalms because they encourage me to see the beauty in this life that God has given me. He gives me great abounding love in so many ways, through the world around me, through the people I encounter, through the things I read. Though sometimes I feel discouraged and depressed about how my life has been I know that God has great things for me and has made me the way he wants me to be.

As an aside, this time last year I was meeting a couple of beautiful, genuine men in Spain. They shared their thoughts, jokes, and dinner with me and my friends. From left to right: Rachel, Helder, Markus, and Tori.

Don't Think in Black & White, Think in Khaki & Green

In all of my musing lately, I have been reminded that life is not black and white. Occasionally, you can find a situation where thinking in black and white is appropriate and helpful, but really I think that's rare. It would be nice though, wouldn't it? So I could just say, "He was selfish and thoughtless. He is bad. I can hate him now." It doesn't work like that though. Instead it's, "He was selfish and thoughtless. He is human. I can still be really angry at him." Life is not simple! Can I get an Amen? People are not bad or good, they're a bit of both. But lucky for me, when one person disappoints me five more surprise me with their goodness and friendship. I am fortunate to know a great number of mostly good people!


What really got me thinking about this whole black v. white concept was actually the recent California budget issues. Funding for California State Parks has been cut and the department is looking at closing a number parks statewide, a few of which are in Sacramento. The list of parks to be closed was made based on attendance and revenue generation. The thing is, just because something has low attendance doesn't mean it's not culturally or historically important. Sutter's Fort is on "the list." But Sutter's Fort is so important! I mean they have artifacts from the Donner Party there! How cool is that?! And they have a really neat overnight program for 4th graders, so that they can experience firsthand what life would have been like in the 1800s. Even though Sutter's Fort doesn't generate that much money for State Parks it is still valuable. It's not a black and white issue. It is a khaki and green issue though. Parks rule!

The Strange Plot to Cripple Alison Graff

Doesn't sadness always cause us to ask why? Anger, too. Why did this happen to me? Why do I have to deal with this? Right now I'm wondering how I'm supposed to deal with cutting someone entirely out of my life while there's still a part of me that cares about him. Why are pictures so hard to get rid of? Why is it that sometimes I feel like I'm doing better and then a few minutes later I'll find myself crying? I found myself asking, "How long? How long will it take for me to feel better?" But at least every day offers something good. For example, yesterday when I woke up and didn't want to get out of bed I began to compare myself to Audrey Hepburn at the end of Roman Holiday, and any time you can compare yourself to Audrey Hepburn you'll feel better. Oh, here's another one: why do I have to be so sensitive to everything right now? Like Nancy Kerrigan said, "Why me?" Oh well. It's not going to last forever.

Introspectacles

I am growing up. It's hard. I don't know if anyone else knew that but it's true. Sometimes it really stinks. You actually have to make decisions for yourself. They're supposed to be good decisions, too. Good decisions are harder to make than you might think. Recently, I decided to give up an addiction. I was addicted to a person. I spent a lot of time with him and still care about him a lot but the relationship just wasn't what it should be. Now I'm going through withdrawals. My heart breaks every day. More than once a day. I miss him. My consolation is that I think we will both learn a lot from the experience. I am spending a lot of time thinking about what kind of a person I am, what I can improve, what people in general are like. People are made to be together, that I know, but we're also so messed up. We're so complex, made up of so many conflicting emotions and experiences and all kinds of different influences. I know I am resilient though. I know it won't last forever, for either of us. I also have a fabulous support team, two people who love me probably as unconditionally as any human beings can. Rachel and Heather, I can't thank you enough.

This day last year...

On this day last year, I was on my way with two of my best friends, Tori and Rachel, to Spain. That was so good. What a way to start a year-- a pilgrimage, a soul search, adventures with friends. Every year should start off like that. Of course, I don't have the money or the time to do it this year. But what about a mini-pilgrimage? What can I do? Climb Half Dome? Probably not. Any ideas?